To understand why asking for
help is a strength and not a weakness, it is important to see asking as an art, one that we continually learn and develop, throughout our entire lives.
Even as infants, we know that
asking achieves results. Initially, we ask our mothers for what infants need,
want and desire. In children, the art of asking becomes more refined. The
horizons of asking expand to include our fathers, family members and others, as
we learn to ask for what children need, want and desire.
Thus, from early infancy
onward, to ask is to receive, at least in our mind’s eye.
We soon come to realize that
there are things for which we cannot ask. There are also things that we cannot
receive until or unless, we ask for them. Even then, we do not always receive
what we ask for and learn to respond accordingly. Sometimes, our response is
positive, but it may be negative in other instances.
We continue to learn how to ask
as older children, teenagers and adults, of all ages. In fact, we tend to get
better and better at asking for what we need, want and desire. We gradually
refine our asking skills. We may even try to ask in a way that is demanding,
aggressive or abusive, which is not necessarily appropriate and may result in a
reprimand.
We ask whether we are believers
or unbelievers. Asking is a well-known, Biblical concept. As children of God,
knowing our own inadequacies, we may need to re-learn how to ask, based upon
Biblical principles of asking God to meet our needs, wants and desires.
“Ask and ye shall receive.” Matthew 7:7 (1)
It takes courage for us to ask
for anything, particularly when we have to ask in blind faith. Asking for the
impossible at times, we trust God to let His divine will prevail in our minds,
hearts and lives. He alone works in the realm of the impossible.
We ask, knowing that we may
receive no, as our answer from God. We become aware that have to submit to His
divine will, regardless of what we ask for, at any particular time.
Asking can be a humbling
experience, because when we ask, we have to humble ourselves before God,
acknowledging our own shortcomings, as we seek higher wisdom and guidance from
Him. It can be humbling to admit our weaknesses, as well as to ask others for anything.
Asking is often, but not always
perceived as a weakness from a worldly perspective, as everyone has to ask for
something, at one time or another. Being afraid to ask is a weakness, even to
an unbeliever.
As parents and teachers, we
teach our children to become independent, so that they do not have to ask for
what they need. In some ways, we may be teaching them not to ask and then, when
they do ask for something, we may regard it as weakness on their part. For
example, with respect to a teen who is asking for money, when he or she should already be financially
independent, asking may be perceived as a weakness.
Asking, we expect to receive;
we do not expect not to receive what we ask for. Perhaps we should always allow
for the possibility of not receiving what we ask for, but when we do not
receive, we may become angry and take out our frustration on others. Then, we
may wind up needing to ask for forgiveness from them and from God.
Asking invariably carries an
inherent, potential rejection factor.
We ask for jobs and expect to
receive them. We ask for bank loans and expect to receive them. We ask others
to be our spouses and expect a positive response, that we do not always
receive. The rejection of others may be devastating to us.
Dealing with rejection is difficult for everyone, perhaps one of the hardest things that people
have to deal with, but in the end, we learn how to handle rejection.
Asking is an art in itself.
There are good ways to ask and not so good ways, not to ask. We quickly learn
that using a good way to ask for something, often achieves much better results.
In other words, asking in an emotionally healthy way is better than asking
in a way that is not.
Believing that to ask is to
receive, is a positive, powerful strength. Sometimes, it takes strength to
receive what we ask for. Not to receive may be regarded as a lack of faith with
regard to what we believe.
In conclusion, let us suggest
that in terms of Norman Vincent Peele’s book, “The Power of Positive Thinking,”
(2) asking would be regarded as a positive, making it a strength, while not
asking would be a negative or a weakness.
Asking takes a lot of courage
at times, so always be strong and ask God in faith, for what you need, want and
desire and expect to receive it. Remember to give Him
thanks.
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